ON SCHOOL REPORTS AND WHAT TRULY MATTERS

Last week, I sat down at our kitchen table to open my own son’s Grade 6 school report. As a parent, there’s always that moment of anticipation; not just about marks, but about how he’s growing up. This term, Jimmy achieved his goal in every subject area. He was understandably proud. Then he asked me about the comment his teacher had written.

I read it aloud to him: how he is kind and gentle, how he laughs easily, gets along with others, has grown into a leader, works hard and excels in his learning. To my surprise, Jimmy frowned slightly and said, “But that doesn’t tell me much else about how I did in each subject.”

Without missing a beat, I corrected him, gently but firmly. I told him that the comments about who he is as a human being will always matter more than the little letter next to the subject name on his report. That these words are the real evidence of a life well-lived.

Because while curriculum outcomes and grades matter, they are never the whole story. The research on character education is unequivocal: it is the single greatest long-term predictor of success in learning, work, and life. As Dr. Marvin Berkowitz notes, “Character shapes how we use our knowledge, skills, and abilities. Without character, they can do harm as easily as good.” This is why teaching values, virtues, and habits of heart is so important; and why it must begin in the home.

We parents are our children’s first and most influential teachers. The words we use, the stories we tell, the way we respond to setbacks or triumphs; all of it forms the foundation for who our children will become. At school, we aim to build on that foundation. But we can’t replace it. Character is not an “extra” or an “add-on.” It is the ground of education itself.

As the Christian mystic Thomas Merton wrote, “Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.” This is especially true for our children. And so, as we look ahead to the coming school holidays, let’s remember what these breaks are for. They are meant to punctuate the year with time for leisure, rest, and connection. Critical developmental research confirms the necessity of “unstructured time” for children to grow socially and emotionally.

Our kids need days when they are not assessed, critiqued, scrutinised, judged or evaluated. They need time to play, to wonder, to be with family, to heal from the busyness of term time. Cynthia Bourgeault reminds us that “Stillness is not the absence of movement, but the container for it.” Holidays are that container, a sacred space to simply be.

So as reports go home, let’s read them together, celebrate the goals achieved, reflect on the feedback given; but most of all, let’s cherish the words that speak to who our children are becoming. And then let’s close the reports, put them away, and head outside to kick a ball, go for a walk, share a meal, tell a story, laugh together. That, in the end, is the best kind of learning there is.

Wishing you and your family a restful, joy-filled break.

Mr Casimir Douglas

Monday 30th June, 2025

Jimmy & I at the Easter Monday AFL Clash this year: Cats vs Hawks